The Penwith Smoker's Club

WELCOME

Note: Reasonably-priced women in low-cut dresses are always admitted, for free.

NO ADMITTANCE

for Cops, Robbers, Teachers, UK Government Employees and UK Government Workers, EnviroMentalists... Climate Change Freakies and Radio 4 Worriers, et al

WARNING

The management here are psychologically incapable of suffering miserable bastards gladly.

WARNING: Non-Smokers DIE, Everyday